Calvin and Hobbes II:Lost at Sea Transcript

Scene 1: The First Day of Summer
(Calvin sits at his desk, looking bored. Miss Wormwood sits at her desk.)

Miss Wormwood: Now, class, before I let you go for the summer, I'd like to go over a small assignment for the season.

(Calvin's eye twitches)

Miss Wormwood: When I see you again, I want to see a two page report about how your summer was. It doesn't have to be too descriptive, I just want to make sure you keep your writing over the...

(The bell rings. Calvin has disappeared. The other students pack their things and run out of the classroom.)

Miss Wormwood: See you in August, class.

(Got A Hold of Me by Santiago X The Natural plays. Susie walks onto the bus and sees Calvin sitting in his seat, writing in a small notebook. Susie sits next to Calvin.)

Susie: Hey, Calvin.

(Calvin looks up at her.)

Calvin: Ah, yes, of course. Much greetings.

Susie: What are you doing?

Calvin: Vey important and top secret information that will for sure change humanity as we know it.

Susie: It says, "List of Things Not to Do This Summer".

Calvin: To the untrained eye, I can see why you would make that misconception.

Susie: Whatever, Calvin. I think I actually might be going to Denver this summer.

Calvin: Intriguing. I was there just last week.

Susie: No you weren't.

Calvin: I was, indeed. Hobbes, MTM and I were doing a very important study of the giant, mutant, tadpole things that live in the Denver sewers. Well... MTM and I were studying them, Hobbes was hiding through most of it.

Susie: You were in class last week.

Calvin: You keep forgetting I can teleport.

Susie: How can I be so naive?

Calvin: Still trying to figure that out.

Susie: So, what do you plan on doing this summer, Calvin?

Calvin: Probably a lot of nothing. With any luck, no one will interrupt it.

Susie: What's your report going to be like, then?

Calvin: Probably very boring. Don't expect too much.

Susie: Well, I'm going to meet my favorite actor at the Denver Film Festival.

Calvin: Ah, and who's that?

Susie: Dennis Quaid.

Calvin: Sounds like a glorious old time. Tell him hello, and I'll try and get the nanobots out of his bathtub by Thursday.