Calvin,Hobbes,and the Pilgrims Transcript

Scene 1
(Calvin and Hobbes are watching a Thanksgiving special on TV. Dad comes in the house.)

Dad: Well, four days until Thanksgiving!

Calvin: So?

Dad: SO? Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks!

Calvin: I've noticed that.

Dad: The company I work for is giving us a free turkey for tomorrow.

Calvin: Whoop-dee-doo. What's so great about a dead bird?

Dad: It's what the Pilgrims had on the very first Thanksgiving.

Hobbes: Why didn't the Pilgrims go out for pizza?

Calvin: Why didn't the Pilgrims go out for pizza?

(Dad rolls his eyes, and walks away.)

Calvin: What a dumb holiday. Thanksgiving has to be the stupidest idea ever invented.

Hobbes: It was made back before DVD's were invented.

Calvin: Figures.

Scene 2
(Dad comes in the house the next day, holding a big package.)

Calvin: What the heck is that thing?

Dad: It's the turkey!

Calvin: Ah. And, uh, did you mug and defeather that thing on your own, or did some lunatic do it?

(Dad ignores him, and sets the turkey down on the table. Hobbes enters the room.)

Hobbes: What is that thing? Or do I want to know?

Calvin: I'm not sure if you do, old buddy. Someone killed a bird.

(Hobbes sighs and shakes his head.)