Calvin and Hobbes Fanon Wiki:The Movie Transcript

The transcript for Calvin and Hobbes Fanon Wiki:The Movie.

Written by JaJaLoo

Opening Credits
C&H Entertainment presents...

a Showbox and Modern Enterprise production...

a film by Steven Spielberg

Calvin and Hobbes Fanon Wiki:The Movie

Starring JaJaLoo...

Jamz64...

StrayberryFilling...

NLG343...

Milesprower690...

with NMMacc18...

and Roads

Story by Phil Lord and Chris Miller

Casting by Sergio Pablos

Music by Joe Kraemer

Edited by Ken Schretzmann

Production Designed by Steven Spielberg

Photography Directed by James Neil Thomas

Clothes Designed by Millford + Taylor and Banana Republic

Executive Producer:Frank Marshall

Written by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller

Produced by Steven Spielberg, Clint Eastwood and Christopher Nolan

Directed by Steven Spielberg

Scene 1:Then and Now
(JaJaLoo walks in front of a black screen. He starts narrating.)

JaJaLoo:Hi. I'm JaJaLoo. I'm going to tell you the story of how I joined the greatest wiki in the world,the Calvin and Hobbes Fanon Wiki. No,this isn't what the film is about. That would be boring,would it? Anyway,I was bored at a after school care called Speedsters. So I got on an iPad,and searched up Calvin and Hobbes Movie. When I was in Google,Calvin and Hobbes(Movie) was the first to come up. So I tapped it,and I was obsessed. I started my career by writing the Calvin and Hobbes 5 transcript. I took a hint from Strayberry Filling(formerly Clvnnhobz),and got an account. Now we'll fast forward to now,where I have made over 200 edits under the big boss,Strayberry. This whole adventure started one day at the wiki home in Chicago. I was working when me and three other wiki users were called into Strayberry's office.

(Cut to the wiki home in Chicago.)

Strayberry(over speaker):JaJaLoo,Jamz64,NLG343,and Milesprower690,come to my office,pronto!

NLG: That dosen't sound good.

Milesprower690: Yeah.

Jamz: You guys don't know what's gonna happen.

NLG: Your right, Let's just go.

(JaJaLoo walks over to the elevator. He is joined by NLG343,Jamz64,and Milesprower690.)

JaJaLoo:Hey,guys.

Jamz64:Hey.

NLG:Hi.

Milesprower690:Hello.

(The elevator doors close.)

JaJaLoo:Why do you think Strayberry called us up in his office?

NLG:Dunno. Maybe we'll get promoted.

Jamz:You've made 800 edits and you haven't got promoted.

NLG: *elbows Jamz in the ribs playfully* Oh, shut up.

(The elevator doors open,revealing Clvnnhobz relaxing in his chair.)

Strayberry:Hello,everyone. Good morning.

Milesprower690:It's 12:30.

Strayberry:My mistake. I have called you up here because I noticed your great work on this wiki. So I'm giving you promotions.

NLG:Called it!

Strayberry:SHUT UP OR I'LL DEMOTE YOU! Now anyway, I'm making JaJaLoo,my vice president,NLG,my secretary,Jamz,another secretary,and Milesprower690,treasurer. Those are code word for.......admin.

(The users cheer)

JaJaLoo:Woo-Hoo!

Jamz:Alright!

Strayberry:Silence!

(The users quiet down.)

Strayberry:You are all dismissed. See you tomorrow.

(The users leave the office)

JaJaLoo:Admins!

NLG:At last! Those 809 edits paid off!

Milesprower690: What can happen?

Scene 2:Kidnapped
(JaJaLoo and NLG are in a hotel room when JaJaLoo wakes up from a bad dream, only it looks like it's real. He wakes up NLG)

NLG:What is it?

JaJaLoo:I thought I heard something.

NLG:What is it?

JaJaLoo:Strayberry is having something bad happen to him.

(Later,the four are running down the street to the office)

Jamz:What happened?

Milesprower690:Dunno. JaJaLoo,do you know?

JaJaLoo:Yeah. Strayberry is having something bad happen to him.

NLG: Really? Let's run.

JaJaLoo:The factory's in front of us.

NLG: Inside. *tries to open the door* Crap! It's locked.

Jamz:I'll bust the door open!

(Jamz sidekicks the door,and it breaks.)

Jamz:My bad.

JaJaLoo:No time! To Strayberry's office!

(JaJaLoo scans his security card and they run in the office. Nothing is there.)

JaJaLoo:Huh. I must've misheard.

Milesprower690:Hold it. There's a note.

(JaJaLoo picks up the Post-It note and reads it.)

JaJaLoo:It says,If you want to find your friend,go to Hawaii. Hawaii! I was there once for Thanksgiving!

NLG:Take some bonds from the safe.

JaJaLoo:I don't know NLG. He might block us.

NLG:I don't mean the master safe! I mean YOUR safe!

JaJaLoo:Sorry, misheard you. Geez.

(JaJaLoo takes a thousand dollars and they go to the airport.)

Scene 3: Airport
(NLG drives them O'Hare Airport, the main airport in Chicago. Once there,JaJaLoo and Jamz buy snacks for the trip,Milesprower690 is listening to his music,and NLG is getting tickets.)

Airline Worker:I'm sorry,but we're sold out of tickets to Hawaii.

NLG:Oh come on,you gotta have four more tickets!

Airline Worker:I'm sorry. Hawaii is a very popular place to visit this time of year.

NLG: It's not even winter! No wonder Delta is so inconvenient. I'm going to another airline! (walks off)

(In the convienence store)

Jamz:Do you think that NLG will like these Lemonheads?

JaJaLoo:Yeah. I never know what he likes but,we'll wing it. I got you some Skittles.

Jamz:The dessert kind?

JaJaLoo:Yeah,I tried these when I went up to Vail for a ski trip one year. Good stuff. Got my Mike and Ikes?

Jamz:Five boxes. Don't waste them.

JaJaLoo:Great. I just rented Step Brothers. It's a great movie.

(NLG runs into the store with Milesprower690.)

Jamz:There you are. Any luck?

NLG:That's what we came to tell you about. Delta has no tickets to Hawaii, not even standby.

Voice: Second time's the charm. How about American?

Milesprower690:Who are you?

Voice:I am one of the new hires.

JaJaLoo: I know that guy...

(The hidden figure turns out to be a bot with an N on his shirt and pants.)

JaJaLoo:NMMacc18? What are you doing here?

NMMacc18:I saw you guys run away from some skyscraper. I wondered what you were up to,so I followed you.

JaJaLoo:That's...just...STUPID!

NMMacc18:I know. But I wanted to tag along!

NLG: He's right. Calm down, JaJa...

JaJaLoo:Don't call me JaJa!

(JaJaLoo goes Super Saiyan)

NLG:Calm down!

(JaJaLoo does so.)

NMMacc18:I thought we could sneak into the luggage compartment on the bottom of the plane...

JaJaLoo:No,American would be great,although I'm used to Southwest.

NLG:This airport doesn't support Southwest!

JaJaLoo:Darn. Alright,let's do American. Delta kinda sucks anyway.

(They run to the gate.)

Jamz:Did we miss the flight?

Airline Worker 2:No,you just made it.

Users:YES!

(The run onto the plane and take their seats.)

JaJaLoo:Shall we begin Step Brothers?

NLG:Yeah.

Scene 4:Hawaii
(The plane lands,and the users exit. They grab their bags,and rent a car.)

Jamz:Smells like Hawaii.

JaJaLoo:That's exactly what I said when I landed here.

NLG:So,what hotel are we staying at?

JaJaLoo:(laughs) Hotel? What sicko stays at a hotel in Hawaii? We're staying at the beach house my family stayed at when I went there!

NMMacc18:Beach house?

Jamz:Did he say beach house?

(The car parks at the beach house.)

Milesprower690:This is amazing!

(They get in,and party till they learn a luau is taking place.)

NLG:A luau,eh? Sounds fun.

JaJaLoo:Yeah. I remember when I went to a luau. Some people got up to learn the hula,including my brother,grandma,and a friend,who's apparently a moviemaker.

Jamz:Interesting. Let's go in!

(They enter the luau,get shell necklaces,and walk to the buffet,where they gorge on ham,mashed potatoes,Jell-O and coconut cake. One of the hosts gets on a stage.)

Host:Welcome to our luau! Thank you all for coming. Now,you five(points at the table where the users are sitting) come up and learn the hula!

JaJaLoo:No thanks,I'm good.

Jamz:Come on,JaJaLoo,it'll be fun!

JaJaLoo:No.

(They leave the luau and get in the car.)

NLG:Well,that was fun. What next?

JaJaLoo:Witness the beach house destroyed!

(JaJaLoo points out the car window,where it is revealed the beach house is trashed.)

Milesprower690:Another note!

JaJaLoo:It says,"This time,go to Japan!" Jeez,this kidnapper is everywhere at once! Alright,grab our bags,let's roll!

Scene 5: Japan
(The users board a ferry boat and it goes to Japan.)

JaJaLoo: Alright, we're here in Japan. Now what?

NMMacc18: Take a break. We should go birdwatching.

Jamz: Seriously? Who birdwatches?

NMMacc18:It'll be nice to relax. Birdwatching is a relaxing activity.

JaJaLoo:Fine...

(3 hours later, the users are bored.)

JaJaLoo:I'm bored.

NLG:Me too.

NMMacc18:OK,maybe I was wrong.

Milesprower690:I see the kidnapper.

JaJaLoo:Nice work.

(There is a pause. Then JaJaLoo's head shoots up)

JaJaLoo:You see the kidnapper?

Milesprower690:Yeah. This way!